su&hao

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On the day of Sunday, 14 May 2006,20:50:00

文字文字文字。密密麻麻地，整整齊齊地，操練在熒光屏上。流着汗水的文字，多麽努力的文字，是我的，我的孩子，我卻對他們沒什麽感覺。我平日的歇斯底里掩蓋着無動於衷。

我擅于表現的無動於衷只會出現在歇斯底里的時候。

*NANA向大家招手哦！嗨！！！*

******

對於不知道的人可能會覺得莫名其妙，可是我自命英明地想到了一些東西，如下：

創作是需要理由的。聼我説下去。

他相信所以他創作。
他沉淪所以他創作。
他瘋癲所以他創作。

大家都需要一些理由。告訴我，你想做哪一個他？

不能不明不白。

su |

On the day of Saturday, 13 May 2006,04:01:00

The internet at my hall has been a little sort sort dei but miraculously, HK Radio 903 played through the night! Felt nice waking up to live voices, made me feel happy enough to go back to sleep.
Good choice of Chinese songs on 903 this morning (their evening)… I want their songlist! Only caught one song title: 小美人 by 旺福樂團. Anyone has that song?

My messy room is totally spoiling my Fengshui therefore, today I am gonna pack! I am so clean! I am sacrificing time to pack my room instead of writing my essay leh!!! Heehee…

******

Sometimes I think I go through life without knowing what’s going on although I do try to get a grip on things. It’s because I take myself too seriously and ask to be taken too seriously too. I behave like I’ve so-thought-it-through but I haven’t lor… maybe I couldn’t admit that I am flippant and moody. I end up being a little 后知后觉 amongst other things. But well, now I say yes I am - flippant and moody.
So I'm gonna start taking myself a lot less seriously from now on. And egg people on to take me less seriously. Like, when I say I think you are damn off lah, I don’t really mean it. Or, I might have meant it when I said it (or not) but how I feel won’t last forever. I may have changed my mind (or not). So don’t believe what I say a hundred percent. I may (or may not) believe myself totally also. So what I’ve just said, maybe don’t believe also.

******

DUH!!!

Aiyoh… dunno what I’m writing… hahaha… (seriously, there are too many seriouslies lor~) I typed the above five days ago but since all my 乖孩子 have been updating their blogs, I thought I shouldn’t let things stagnate for too long here. This is one of those ‘today I went to the supermarket’ blogs.

Recently I’ve been having mood swings… Woohoo! Up, down and the whole way round! Siao… But I haven’t given up! I’m still thankful to be alive! I have goals in life and the very living, breathing me is given the chance to make my way towards them! Today is 12th May 2006 (gulp!) but shall leave the date as five days ago since the bulk of this blog was written then.

Eh... I cannot edit the date leh...

su |

On the day of Thursday, 4 May 2006,06:50:00

我把这张相片放上了电脑荧幕，当壁纸。
我在电脑前呆坐了一个下午。
我看着我看着猫看着门。

我有这么好看吗？
猫有这么好看吗？
门有这么好看吗？

其实也只是因为。。。

我把这张相片放上了电脑荧幕，当壁纸。

su |

On the day of Wednesday, 3 May 2006,01:09:00

人的身体里是否真的有个时钟？
0700 起床
0730 早餐
0900 开工
1200 午餐等等。

是否是，很自然地，
0岁出世
1岁说话，走路
12岁来月经
25岁生孩子？？？

因为，25岁的我突然想当妈妈。

*cue婴儿号啕大哭之声*

这是个荒谬的发想，因为我离金钱与婚姻都太遥远，现时不可能当上妈妈。大自然的原理之一：人是为了传宗接代而存在的。如果这是千真万确的，那我现在的感觉可以归就于它。25岁，母性泛滥。我的身体是顺着这个原理在运作。笨蛋的身体，还好脑子是聪明又前卫的。生孩子嘛，你说25岁好我就25岁生吗？有那么简单？

写到这里都有点不想生了。

人家卢巧音都还没生！

很想當媽媽
曲：凱文詞：陳少

用了過份臂力雙手攬緊你
用了過份努力不鬆一口氣
願永遠日夜一起

# 被你攝入鏡內畫面多優美
共你躺在雪地高飛不喘氣
而但我怕樂極生悲
我倆可相對亦會永遠失去
我要保管你在我的身軀 #

* 很想當媽媽我不理代價
手中的娃娃會將愛淨化
動靜亦是像你吧
在每夜伴著入睡讓我表演結他
很想當媽媽買一隻木馬
哭聲怎喧嘩我不會害怕
面目亦是像你吧
逐漸逐漸讓我不怕
愛戀的氧化

讓我抱著抱著再看迪斯尼
讓我吻著吻著小小的手臂
而像與你日夜一起
Repeat #
很想當媽媽買一隻木馬
哭聲怎喧嘩我不會害怕
面目亦是像你吧
逐漸逐漸讓我感覺那身體變化 Repeat *

You go first!!!

You go first!!! Dozo!!!

su |